I was the victim of a graduate school education in psychology. As a consequence, I was able to obtain a license to practice psychology, issued by the North Carolina Psychology Board in 1979. I’m a psychologist, but please don’t confuse me with the rest of them.
I'm learning so much wisdom from your writing and podcasts. My wife and I live in Hong Kong, which has a strong culture of micromanaging children's daily lives, and I find it difficult to convince my wife that we can let our 5 year handle some, or many, things by herself. While I have to admit that many children here generally are on a much more positive track than their American counterparts, a majority definitely do not emancipate at 18, with most staying at home almost indefinitely in some form or another. During my first years here, I accepted the argument that housing costs are ridiculously high, and, in addition, family culture is generally stronger. But now I'm not so sure. Sometimes the lack of independent thinking seems to be one of the side effects of the micromanaged and over protected population.
Thanks much for your kind words. As for parenting in China, two of my books are best-sellers there. That simply means that the Chinese think American ideas are examples to be followed. In addition, in talking with Chinese people, I am of the impression that the one-child policy caused parents to make idols of their children. Little Emperors, I believe they call them. I suspect that as parent-child codependency has become the norm in the States, it has become the norm elsewhere.
Unfortunately, when a parent tries to give their child independence, neighbors and other people can really pose a problem. I have had CPS investigations started against me TWICE because I let my 6 year old bike outside our mobile home without following 2 feet behind him. No, I actually do productive things- like cook dinner- while he plays outside! Who will cook dinner if I have to follow my child around while he plays? And before anyone lectures me about safety, my son is well versed in safely rules, and the mobile home park requires background checks before anyone is allowed to live there. The neighbor who most recently complained about me is a bitter, liberal childless woman who lives alone. Funny how it’s the childless who think they have a say in other people’s children’s upbringing. I completely reject the moral authority of CPS-they are a corrupt organization- but unfortunately they can cause practical problems. Now I am looking for “hidden places” where I could move to where neighbors won’t raise hell if I try to raise my child with common sense. Any advice?
I'm learning so much wisdom from your writing and podcasts. My wife and I live in Hong Kong, which has a strong culture of micromanaging children's daily lives, and I find it difficult to convince my wife that we can let our 5 year handle some, or many, things by herself. While I have to admit that many children here generally are on a much more positive track than their American counterparts, a majority definitely do not emancipate at 18, with most staying at home almost indefinitely in some form or another. During my first years here, I accepted the argument that housing costs are ridiculously high, and, in addition, family culture is generally stronger. But now I'm not so sure. Sometimes the lack of independent thinking seems to be one of the side effects of the micromanaged and over protected population.
Thanks much for your kind words. As for parenting in China, two of my books are best-sellers there. That simply means that the Chinese think American ideas are examples to be followed. In addition, in talking with Chinese people, I am of the impression that the one-child policy caused parents to make idols of their children. Little Emperors, I believe they call them. I suspect that as parent-child codependency has become the norm in the States, it has become the norm elsewhere.
Unfortunately, when a parent tries to give their child independence, neighbors and other people can really pose a problem. I have had CPS investigations started against me TWICE because I let my 6 year old bike outside our mobile home without following 2 feet behind him. No, I actually do productive things- like cook dinner- while he plays outside! Who will cook dinner if I have to follow my child around while he plays? And before anyone lectures me about safety, my son is well versed in safely rules, and the mobile home park requires background checks before anyone is allowed to live there. The neighbor who most recently complained about me is a bitter, liberal childless woman who lives alone. Funny how it’s the childless who think they have a say in other people’s children’s upbringing. I completely reject the moral authority of CPS-they are a corrupt organization- but unfortunately they can cause practical problems. Now I am looking for “hidden places” where I could move to where neighbors won’t raise hell if I try to raise my child with common sense. Any advice?