Off the Cuff: Seven Hundred and Fifty Dollars!

If before reading this, you intended to vote for Kamala Harris, and you still intend to vote for her AFTER reading this, then you cannot come to my upcoming birthday party, which promises to be a spectacular affair featuring the long-awaited reunion of Led Zeppelin.

Since the utter devastation wreaked in western North Carolina by Hurricane Helene, our ersatz POTUS, “Basement Joe” Biden, has yet to be seen by the residents of that formerly beautiful area of the country. Now, the same communist media that had a field day when George W. Bush merely did a fly-over of the mess Katrina left behind in 2005, have murmured not a peep in response to Biden’s no-show. Isn’t that fascinating? What does it tell you?

Furthermore, people who are now homeless, jobless, emotionally if not physically shattered, and in some cases, kin-less because of Helene have been informed not to expect much from FEMA because it’s out of money, having dedicated their share of this year’s budget to MIGRANT ISSUES. Translate: FEMA blew its bucks on non-citizens who shouldn’t be here and now have nothing left to help bona fide U.S. citizens who have every right to be here and every right to expect government assistance.

Oh, I’m so sorry. Correction. I’m now informed that residents of my state WILL be receiving monetary relief. Kamala Harris, speaking not from western North Carolina, but from Augusta, Georgia, where Helene’s impact was negligible, comparatively speaking, has promised that every person/family that needs assistance because of Helene will be receiving (Lord knows when) a whopping $750 from the government that does not know how to govern. (She said this with a straight face, mind you.)

Seven hundred and fifty dollars! If you stood by and watched Helene turn your home into a pile of rubble, you, a U.S. citizen, are going to get a windfall of $750! Hoo-hah! If you have no home, no car, no truck, no money, and lost a close relative to the storm and they have yet to find the body, you are getting $750! Yes! No joke! If you live in an area where no grocery stores are open because they can’t receive supplies, no gas stations have gas, all the drug stores are closed, and your house, last you saw it, was floating down the French Broad River as it slowly came apart, and you had no flood insurance, you, you lucky devil you, are going to be getting $750! These days, that’s about the cost of a hamburger, hold the pickles, in Asheville, North Carolina, where I was born but which is now more aptly called “Asvl.” Those of you who had a child swept away in the raging waters, are going to be able to console yourself with—yes, you are hearing me correctly—let’s all say it together now--$750!!! Yowsah!

When are they going to receive this windfall? Before you take a stab at answering that, remember, the people in question are here in the USA legally, which means they shouldn’t be counting chickens while they wait for the money. Did you get the memo? Tax-paying citizens are being sent to the end of the queue.

The town of Lansing, North Carolina, which is more than 100 miles from Asvl, was experiencing an influx of new businesses started by hale and hearty entrepreneurs who were rehabbing previously abandoned buildings that sat about 100 yards from Big Bear Creek. Those buildings were flooded to their ceilings and will probably be condemned. Needless to say, no one had flood insurance.

Meanwhile, Basement Joe is watching Scooby-Doo reruns in his…do I even need to say it? And Kamala Harris, his reliable stand-in, is in Augusta, Georgia, where life pretty much goes on, promising people whose lives were utterly destroyed about 200 miles north of there…$750.

Tell ya what. Instead of coming to my birthday party (I just canceled Led Zeppelin anyway), go to samaritanspurse.org and donate what you can to help fund their 24/7 relief work in the six states that were slammed by what is being called a “1000-year storm.”

Franklin Graham for POTUS!