Off the Cuff: Klever Kamala

Oct 25, 2024

Over the past few weeks, several well-known persons have publicly expressed their belief that Kamala Harris is, in the words of America’s poet-laureate, one Donald J. Trump, “stupid.”

National Review recently published an editorial calling Harris an “idiot.”

In an interview with Tucker Carlson, Elon Musk called she-who-would-be-POTUS a “puppet.” With one notorious exception, puppets are as dumb as a block of wood.

I disagree with these assessments. Over the course of my legendary career, I administered at least one thousand IQ tests to both adults and children, in the course of which my ability to estimate a person’s intellectual acumen sharpened to the point of an ice pick. In Kamala’s case, after watching numerous speeches by and interviews of her I estimate her intelligence to be slightly above average. Like, around 110. Not impressive, but Stammering Joe’s I Q is no higher. Let me clarify: Stammering Joe’s IQ was no higher than 110 BEFORE he began stammering. I actually think the last POTUS with an IQ above 135 (superior) was James Madison.

Kamala’s strength is politics, and politics is saying one thing and meaning another. Politics is being so vague as to be able, later, to deny that what one seemed to be saying is not close to what one actually said.

Interviewer: “Ms. Harris, you’re on record as saying you won’t ban fracking. Are you willing, right now, to tell our audience that under no circumstances will you ban fracking, which made us energy-independent during the presidency of America’s fascist-in-residence?”

Harris: “I believe in the American middle class and this is a middle-class issue. I grew up with middle-class parents [fact-check failure] who believed in American values [they were both socialists to the core] and instilled in me, from an early age, the value of listening to both sides of a debate before forming an opinion [fact-check failure] and my opinion on this important issue is not unlike my opinion on other issues. I’ve had the benefit, over the years, of having wonderful tutors who taught me not to rush to judgment on anything and I’m not rushing to judgment here, either, but the people of Pennsylvania can always rely on me to defend their values and make sure their children receive a world-class education. Thanks for giving me the opportunity to clarify that.”

Interviewer: “What is your position on abortion?”

Harris: “I love babies! Let me assure you and everyone who’s listening, I absolutely love babies! I was a baby once. I know babies. What more can I say?”

That is a reasonably accurate (albeit fictional) representation of Ms. Harris’ verbal gymnastics. That is not a stupid person.

What Kamala Harris lacks in the intellect department (sixty years ago, when academic standards were rigorous, she wouldn’t have gotten into law school), she makes up for in cleverness.

Clever people are dangerous. The serpent (Genesis 3), the most dangerous being ever, is introduced as “the most clever creature” in God’s creation. All clever people are descended from the master of lies.

I am a cynic, a skeptic. Detecting cleverness requires cynicism. Every single time Kamala speaks, my clever-detector begins howling and flashing blood red.

Kamala recently told an interviewer that the American people are “ready” for a female president of color. In other words, her ascendancy is a done deal, inevitable, written in the stars, so let’s just get on with it. If we’re ready, but she’s not elected, then white racism/superiority trumped readiness. A vote for Kamala is a means of personal atonement for sins committed before your grandfather from Slovakia was a twinkle in your Slovakian great-grandfather’s imagination. Certainly, you’re “ready” to atone for all that, aren’t you? Vote for Kamala!

Clever indeed. Of course, she’s going to ban fracking. Like every Demoncrat candidate for POTUS, Kamala has masters and her job is to please them, which is the purpose of every female of color who knows the side on which her bread is buttered. Kamala will throw open our border with Mexico and untold numbers of criminals and terrorists will stride proudly through, eager to link up with their sleeper cells. Kamala will raise taxes, making it that much more difficult for middle-class parents to send their kids to schools that actually teach children how to think. Kamala will further burden the middle class with Medicare-for-all. Kamala will abandon Israel to the monsters. Kamala will play softball with evil actors who are laughing at her because they’re playing with highly explosive hardballs.

Klever Kamala can be counted on to do exactly what she says she is not going to do because, by golly-by-gosh, Klever Kamala’s parents raised her right. No, left.